DEUTSCHE VERSION

Experiences and Adventures

with soft paws

Spring fever

It's spring and the sun slowly is slowly banishing winter. Blackbirds and thrushes chase each other through the bushes and over the streets. Even the sparrows are motivated by the first warm days to mate.

For Mumpfi, these days mean only one thing: out onto the balcony to hunt birds. Because the denizens of the air do not willingly offer themselves as prey, they must be observed and stalked. Mumpfi therefore now sits behind the remains of the fall flowers in the balcony crates and tries to be invisible. The old blackbirds though, wise to her ways, have long spotted her and give our balcony a wide berth.

Under the balcony, about 10 feet below, is the roof of the garages. It is regularly the arena for territorial battles between the male blackbirds. Sometimes between two, sometimes between three. Every time, though, their ladies watch with boredom how the gents give their best to impress the ladies. Just like with people. Now, the fellows were so concentrated on their battle that they came pretty close to the balcony. Mumpfi sat behind the wilted flowers and waited for her chance. Suddenly her nerves couldn't take it anymore and Mumpfi sprang into the middle of the fray. She didn't catch anything, but… how can she get back to her balcony now?
First she tried jumping. As a well-fed apartment cat, though, she was too out of shape to manage the leap. Maybe yelling will help? And so began the kitty concert.

My wife stood for awhile on the balcony and tried to encourage Mumpfi to jump. But… as already mentioned, Mumpfi was too heavy. Too much cat food and also too many stolen treats were taking their revenge now. What else could I do, except get the ladder and climb onto the garage roof? So, down to the cellar to get the old, rickety ladder, that was the easy part. As I was almost on the roof, though, my “sins of the stomach” also had their revenge. The last rung broke and I plummeted towards the ground. Surplus padding, particularly on the backside, has its advantages, too. The pounds therefore broke my fall to a good extent and I came away with nothing worse than a huge bruise on my bottom and damaged pride.

In the meantime, Mumpfi, probably following my example, had jumped down from the garage roof and waited placidly at the door to be let inside. I got up, swearing and sighing, and angrily kicked the ladder, which of course fell over and almost clobbered me. I therefore calmed down, let the cat inside, and withdrew to my office to write this story.

a.) broke the ladder b.) made myself a laughingstock in front of the neighbors c.) have become too fat d.) and last but not least, am a wimp because I made such a fuss about such a little fall. Does anyone understand females ………regardless of whether two- or four-legged...... Many thanks to Andreas Koeppen for this submission! Naturally, Mumpfi was comforted by my wife. I was scolded, because I:
          a.) broke the ladder
          b.) made myself a laughingstock in front of the neighbors
          c.) have become too fat
          d.) and last but not least, am a wimp because I made such a fuss about such a little fall.

Does anyone understand females ………regardless of whether two- or four-legged......


Many thanks to Andreas Koeppen for this submission!

Herzlichen Dank für die Übersetzung an EvaSara Tullier !


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